Stop Taking Things Personally

Does someone else's bullying personality make you feel like you're worthless? Do you mistake people's antics for subtle insults? This article will highlight some ways in which you can remain unaffected by others' opinion of you, whether it's a weird look, a teasing remark, or direct criticism.courtesy:wikihow.com



Instructions:

Give the benefit of the doubt. If you have a habit of taking things personally, it means that you're apt to assume someone is directing some form of aggression towards you specifically, when they might be just joking around or having a bad day. It might be your instinct to react, or curl up into a ball emotionally, but pause for a second. Maybe it's not about you. Learn how to gain control of your emotions. Don't jump to conclusions.

Refocus your attention. When you take things personally, you shift your attention from what they said or did, to how you feel. Unless you move on from that point, it's likely that you'll ruminate, and the negative feeling will be amplified. Instead, focus again on the other person.

      > Look at how the person treats others. They might tease, pick on, or even insult everyone they cross paths with. Some people are just antagonistic like that.

      > Consider their insecurities. Could they feel threatened by you in some way? If so, don't feel bad for being your awesome self. Think about how you can help this person feel better about themselves.

      > Keep in mind that the other person may have poor communication and emotional management skills. Imagine that there's an inner child acting out, because the person hasn't learned how to deal with things in a mature way. It's much easier to be patient and feel compassionate when you visualize a learning child at the helm of their behavior.

Remind yourself that you don't need anyone's approval. If you're especially sensitive to people's behavior towards you, to the extent that you regularly overreact, it might be because you've got a strong radar for rejection. If you pick up on any kind of displeasure, you worry that you're doing something wrong, and you want to fix it eagerly and anxiously. But just because someone isn't happy with you doesn't mean you've done something wrong. In many cases, it means that person isn't happy with themselves, and expects you to fill in the blanks (which is impossible).

Speak up. Let the person know how you are feeling. They might not realize how hurtful or aggressive they seem and how it is affecting you. Use "I" statements. If this is recurring, use nonviolent communication to (hopefully) put an end to it, and resolve any underlying issues.

Stop taking compliments personally, too. If you base your self-worth on how much people compliment and validate you, then you're basically allowing others to decide how you feel about yourself. If someone compliments you, it's no more personal than a direct insult. They're simply calling it how they see it, and that may or may not be accurate--only you can be the judge of that. So if someone is positive towards you, that doesn’t make you a better person, it makes them a better person, because they're taking the time to be supportive and encouraging. Your value, your self-worth remains unchanged, because it's something that comes from within.

Not Forget The Most Important Things

Human ability to remember has caused more interest in ancient Greece, where she was honored Mnemosyne – Goddess of memory. In ancient philosophy memory is interpreted as a gift, people close to the divine world – Plato believed it essential for the ability of the soul.

Memory must treat carefully, experts advised today. It can be as capricious and helpful in charge now.



Acts of Memory:

* Memory should not be trained as train as muscles. Senseless “repeating” of the material does not lead to building a habit to learn easier and faster.
Systemic mental exercises can allow to understand more deeply into the substance of the facts easier to get acquainted. They contribute to the emergence of patterns of sound and to recall memorized. Even in mature and older age can achieve improvement of memory if used wisely its subjective.

* It is necessary to obtain quick, accurate and clear impression of what must be remembered.

* Since perceptions are directly related to imagination, it all ways, making it possible to develop imagination and figurative thinking may be useful for remembering.

* Relatively common events in life that make a particularly strong impression can be saved immediately, and stand in the mind very clearly and distinctly, even after many years. More complicated and less interesting events one can experience dozens of times, but they are not sealed in memory for a long time.

* In concentrating attention on the event, once experienced, later in the required sequence can be reproduced in memory of its major points.


* Lack of sufficient attention in the perception of information can not be compensated by increasing the number of its repetition.

* What a person likes, is remembered without any work. This clear pattern is evident especially in more mature years.

* Rare, strange and unusual experiences are remembered better than usual and often repetitive.

* Concentration on material studied in combination with the selective ability to allow people to focus their attention, ie to set the memory to the perception of potentially useful information.

* For best retention of the material recommended its recurrence just before bedtime.Information is better to rest in the memory and not mix with other impressions, which accumulate during the day and actually interfere with remembering.

* For situations left in our emotional memory trace bright, think more, rather than emotionally neutral situations. Positive emotions generally help remembering a negative hinder it.

* If at the time of remembering, a man is in high or low mood, it artificially restored to its emotional state helps remembering.

* Visual impression is strongest. But complex impression ie those obtained using more sensory organs, allowing the material to seal even better in the mind. Some such as read aloud so that perception is both visual and auditory.

* Attention and consideration only. If a man with eyes closed to indicate color and shape of the object that is seen many times, but his attention is turned, it will most likely wrong in many details.

Many people are mistaken if you need to answer what has figures on the face of their mechanical watches – Roman or Arabic. Often it appears that not even digits, and people not remember that fact.


Many can not say your own phone number and the explanation for this is simple – it is rarely used.

Repetition is indeed the mother of knowledge

Dale Carnegie repetition called “second law of memory” and gives the following example: “Thousands of Muslims know the Koran by heart – a book with almost the same volume as the New Testament and that they largely achieved through repetition. We can remember everything you have, within reasonable limits, if we repeat it often enough.

As greater volumes of information, the more repetition is required for its retention. Volume of material is remembered better if split into two or more parts.
courtesy:socyberty.com