How to Make Valentine's Day Special on a Budget

credits: wikihow.com




Avoid equating love with consumption. It's easy to get bogged down in the buying frenzy surrounding Valentine's Day, as retailers vie to rake in some decent profits from romance-inspired lovers. Love isn't about what you give in goods though; it's about what you give by way of time, attention, and acknowledgment of the other person. And none of those can be purchased. Once you view Valentine's Day from the perspective of it being about acknowledging and celebrating your love by spending time together, it's easier to realize that a budget Valentine is still a perfect date opportunity.

Minimize rather than do without. One of the tricks to saving money on Valentine's Day is to still indulge in some of the traditional Valentine's accessories but to reduce them. For example, instead giving her a dozen red roses, give her one, held in your teeth, and accompanied by your best impression of a Spanish dancer. Or, give him a special brand of chocolate bar instead of a whole box of expensive chocolates. In this way, you can still participate in the essence of Valentine's Day but spend very little.

Make your own. A homemade card is always more meaningful than a purchased one. It says not only what you write in it but also "I took the time to make this because I care enough about you to give that time." As far as mementos go, it's likely the card will be kept for many years to come! Other things can be made too, for gifts. Draw on your own skills when making gifts; for example, if you're a keen gardener, give something from the garden; if you're a keen cook, make something delectable; if you're a keen outdoor enthusiast, give a fully guided nature walk or a lesson in your favorite sport.

Think of something you can do for your love. An excellent way to show your love can be through making love coupons or vouchers. These can contain promises that range from the mundane to the downright sexy, all depending on your willingness to do things for your love.

Exchange cheesy but sweet gifts that remind you of one another, for whatever reason. 

Give time. Giving time is the ultimate romantic gesture. It will mean a great deal if you're usually stretched for time and you choose to give up the whole day to spend with your beloved, doing things together that have nothing to do with work, raising a family, paying bills, etc. Banish the mundane and just allow the day to be about the two of you together. As part of this, be thoroughly attentive, listen, and take the chance to share dreams and hopes for the future, including renewing dreams that might have been taken for granted over time.

Create a special evening at home together. Make a meal in which you go to extra trouble. It doesn't have to be expensive food; just spend time making it more complicated and interesting than the usual daily meals. Look online for recipe ideas to help you turn ordinary ingredients into something fabulous. If you're going to watch a special DVD together, be sure to make some tasty popcorn to share.

Stargaze Put on warm clothes and step out to check out the night sky. If you have to travel, add picnic rugs, a thermos of warm drink, some snack bars, and a full tank of fuel. Find somewhere on the city outskirts where the sky is clear. Take along a star chart and look for stars that you know. Choose a star just for the two of you and make a promise to look for it every Valentine's Day.

How to Pout Seductively

We all love to Pout and take selfie's. Pouting can convey several different emotions, depending on how you do it. A pout can be flirty and seductive, or it can express that you are sad or angry. No matter why you want to pout, you will need to master the correct facial expressions and body language in order to make it look genuine. Source wikihow.com 





Position your mouth. If you want a subtle, sultry pout for your next photo, try parting your lips and sticking your bottom lip out just a little. You may want to practice in the mirror first because it's easy to overdo it and end up looking like a fish!

• To get your mouth position right for a photo, try saying the word “blue." It will force your lips forward into a pout. Models often use this tip during photo shoots.
• You may want to complement the pouting look with a slightly squinting eye as well.
• It can take some practice to look seductive, so look at yourself in the mirror and make sure you don't look angry or sad.

Add some color. Nothing brings more pizzazz to your pout than some lipstick! Make sure to choose the right shade for your skin tone and for the occasion. In general, women with warmer complexions should wear shades with yellow or orange undertones, while women with cooler complexions should wear shades with blue undertones. Choose a more neutral shade for the daytime and a more dramatic shade for evening.

• To help make your lipstick last longer, use a primer. If you don't have one, dab some concealer or foundation on your lips before you apply your lipstick.

Plump your lips. The size and shape of your lips is also very important. If you're not happy with the way your pout looks, there are some simple ways to make your lips look bigger with makeup.

• Try using a plumping lip gloss or lipstick. These products work by increasing the blood flow to your lips, causing them to temporarily swell slightly.
• For a more dramatic look, try over lining your lips. To do this, trace around your lips with a lip liner pencil, extending a bit beyond the natural lip line in the middles, but not at the corners. Then fill in with a lipstick that is the same color as the lip liner.

Practice seductive body language. If you want to look seductive, there's more to it than just your facial expression. If you're taking to someone, try making extended eye contact and gently touching the person every so often. Also make sure to stand up straight and keep your arms uncrossed to show that you are open to others.

Have the right attitude. To complete your seductive look, make sure to act the part. You will need to be cheerful and playful. It helps to raise your eyebrows, laugh, and maybe even break your pout on occasion by smiling or biting your lower lip in a flirty way.

Pose Properly. If you want to take a great pouty picture, you will need to make sure that the rest of your body is positioned perfectly as well. To look more photogenic, try extending your chin a bit and positioning your face and body at a slight angle. You should also be conscious of your posture, your hands, and your hair. You want your pouty picture to look as naturally flattering as possible!

Have a Balanced Lifestyle

"Happiness is not a matter of intensity but of balance and order and rhythm and harmony." - Thomas Merton. Happiness can only be achieved if there is a balance between the physical, the mental, the spiritual and the social/emotional. However, intensity does help on occasion. wikihow.com



Physical

Get sufficient exercise. Regular push ups, sit-ups, crunches, jogging or walking are examples. Unless you are disabled in which case you can learn a modified exercise regimen.

Get sufficient rest. About eight hours of sleep helps the body repair itself. You may personally need more or less, as sleep requirements vary between people.

Eat healthier. Look online and find the food pyramid, then try balancing your caloric intake with your exercise. There are several competing food pyramids, so pick one or two because following all of them would be too hard.

Find time to relax. Just lie down and think about what you did before you started relaxing. Think positive thoughts or take up a relaxing hobby like sitting or sleeping.

Pick a hobby that you enjoy. Hobbies can counter daily stress. Unless the hobby is stressful, like base-jumping or self-mutilation. You could try collecting model trains or postage stamps.

Mental

Plan out your day, and set goals. But don't stress out if you don't accomplish everything just the way you planned. Remain flexible and try different approaches to your goals. Remember, sometimes life happens, and you may not have time for everything. Just be productive in the time you have.

Write but keep it positive. No negative thoughts. If you have negative thoughts, do not write them down. Find someone you can vent negative thoughts to -- pretending to be happy all the time will do no good for you in the long run.

Find out and develop your talents. Go out and do activities to find what you like and then pursue the one or two that strike your fancy. If you do three of them that will be too stressful.

Keep a diary or journal. This would be a good place to write things. But remember, no negative thoughts.

Read. Try classics such as Shakespeare, Jane Austen, Montaigne, Proust, or Tolstoy. If you are not fond of those, try the newpaper, a fantasy novel, bibliography, or mystery. There's something for everyone- check out your local library to test the waters.

Try to set goals that are reasonable to achieve. Unreasonable goals are harder and will probably just lead to disappointment.

Spiritual

Pray effectively or meditate and learn different types of asana, such as: the lotus, the corpse, the tree, downward dog, the snake, etc.

Communicate with nature. Go outside, hike, go camping, or have fishing trip. You may find yourself doing most of the talking.

If you are religious, study the Bible, Qu'ran, Geeta, Ramayana, Guru Grant Sahib any Psalms, etc. Learn about Heaven and Mahavir, Jesus Christ, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.

Social/Emotional

Do a good deed for other people.

Cooperate with other people that you meet.

Listen to other people. There is difference between just hearing the words and actually paying attention and listening to them.

Synergize mutually advantageous compatibility of elements, resources or efforts.

Material

Get a good education. To get a good self-supporting job, master the skills necessary for your advancement. That way you will not be dependent upon anyone else.

The job has to be the one you love. "Love it or leave it."

Money is not that important. Happiness is the most important thing. Remember people on Forbes 100 are no happier than average people.

Do Computer Yoga

How are your muscles feeling right now? Take a little break. Do computer yoga. It's very easy, and you'll be relaxed in just a few minutes. Computer yoga will help to resolve the tension felt in your body. It will calm your mind through meditation and self-questioning. Computer yoga is the office worker's and writer's answer to remaining positive through the day; ideally, practicing computer yoga daily will help you to remain positive throughout your daily routine. courtesy:wikihow.com
Move your head and think the mantra "Om" in your head. Turn your head left and right. Forward and backward.


Move your shoulders, so that all tensions resolve. Find the way that works best for you. Move forward, and then move another way round. Move with your elbows and think "Om, Om, Om..." And another way round. Think "Om".

Move your spine to the right and left side. The head also. Think "Om , Om, Om... " in your spine.


Move your feet on the ground. Say "Om" in your belly, in your legs, in your feet and in the earth. Concentrate on the whole earth and think the mantra "Earth".

Massage your body from head to feet. Hold your hands together over your head, rub the palms, visualize the sky above you and say the mantra "Heaven". Feel the light that comes down. Massage the light into your face, your eyes, your ears, your whole body and think "Light, Light..." Fill yourself with light. Move your feet, fill light into the earth and think, "Light...".

Move your hand and send light to your loved ones and to all people. Say "I send light to... May all people be happy. May all the world be happy."

Rub your palms together. Think on the enlightened masters and say, "Om, all enlightened masters, please help me on my way." Now you can ask a question. Think about your life. What are your goals? What is your way? Hear the answer within you. Feel the answer inside. What is the answer?

Put your hands on your legs or your belly. Make your mind calm and think the mantra "Om" in your head, your thorax, your belly, your legs, feet, in the earth and in the whole cosmos. "Om Om Om Shanti Om Peace Om Peace Om Shanti Om Peace..."

Stop your thinking for one minute. Simply sit there. Don't think.

> What do you have to take in your life? Take it. ?
> What is your positive sentence now? What helps you to stay positive through your day and your life? For example, "My positive sentence is: I am optimistic. I follow my way with optimism."

Have fun..!

See Life in a Beautiful Way

Life is very precious. It can be broken and built with the click of a button. That's how life is.... It's beautiful.... How rain can make a rainbow. How a smile can change a day. Life is important. Everyone will get a chance to live it. Dream, Dream, Dream Big... Life is Good!courtesy:wikihow



Take a nature walk. Do research on you town or cities trails and recreational parks and areas. Check online or your local listings. You can enjoy nature on foot or on bike or roller blade. It's not overly important how you travel, just as long as you can soak up the wonder of a peaceful journey. The world is out there you just have to see it.

Create a bucket list. This helps put all your dreams into sight. Things you may forget that you even want! Set time limits along with your goals to help motivate yourself. Find inspiration the best way you know how, from looking through magazines to talking with your friends.

Think of the positives. Even if you agree with the teachings of the book or not, you can agree that positive thinking encourages positive results. So look on the bright side. Become an optimist!

Spread the word about love. Love is one of the most important things in the world. Love is very passionate and very powerful and can can triumph even over the roughest days. Remind yourself whenever things get tough that their are things to love, yourself included. Have a special little dessert that you love, or look through old family photos and realize that you and your family wouldn't be here with out love.

Don't worry be happy! Engulf yourself in positive music! Music has an amazing physiological effect on a mind, and sad music fosters depression. Try to avoid depressing music, especially when your blue already.

Immerse Yourself in Beauty! Hang pictures of beautiful places. Decorate your house in a peaceful way. Google search small animals or things that make you go "Awww". Do whatever it takes to constantly have your eyes and mind pleasured.

Cope With Frustration

Frustration is a form of poorly expressed anger. Frustration is about expecting the world and its inhabitants to be a certain way. In reality, things are as they are and no amount of ranting and steaming is going to change that. What you do need to change is your perspective.courtesy:wikihow



Look for the triggers that cause you to feel frustration. Common ones include:

> Impatience at the speed of people, systems, or results (See How to Be Patient).

> Slow comprehension of facts or a situation by another person

> Lack of reliability of a person, item, or system

> General sense of unfairness or injustice about things that are occurring in your life

> Poor communications resulting in something not being done at all, or on time
Wanting things your own way without compromise

Think through your answers. Do any of the above situations apply to you? If so, note down why. Draw another column and suggest ways that you might address each frustration in a fruitful manner instead. For example:

> "I get frustrated when the traffic crawls to halt and I am sitting in it, sweating. Counter thought: "I do hate the traffic being slow but I can avoid it by leaving earlier or later; or I can ride a bike instead."

> "I cannot stand the way George is so slow at understanding the point of every exercise! I'm tearing out my hair!" Counter thought: "I know that George is a slow learner but my goodness, when he grasps the concepts finally, there is no stopping him and he is often the person who points out errors as we go along, helping us to avoid greater problems at the end of the project. I need to be patient with him and remember that he has this latent skill."

> "Jenny never turns up on time. It's as if she is deliberately trying to ruin every occasion I spend with her!" Counter-thought: "Jenny has a problem with punctuality. It's not my problem unless I make it one. Instead, I need to either make her arrive on time by suggesting she arrive at a time half an hour earlier than the real time set, or I just need to get on with enjoying myself until she does arrive, in the full knowledge that that is her way."

> "Everything is so unfair! Even the weather is against me making my hair all lank and horrible. The people on the street are deliberately bumping into me. The taxi was late and I was late going into the meeting as a result. The whole world is against me!" Counter thought: "It's just one of those days where things happen over which I have little control. All the same, next time I will book my taxi for half an hour earlier to make time for possible delays. And as for my hair, it is probably time to see the hair stylist anyway!"

Breathe deeply and count when you feel a bout of frustration coming on. This is a good opportunity to create your reaction rather than to react and create your frustration. One deep breath, followed by a slow count to ten, during which time you let your thoughts go. Return to reality and consider the situation before you carefully and with a reality check. Ask yourself:

> Are things really as I perceive them?

> What sort of reaction can I give that will properly express my concern, my annoyance, my wishes?

> What good and positive words can I use to express the need for seeing things my way too?

> Am I seeing things in other people's way too?

Remember that frustration is born of wanting things or people to be a certain way that is fixed in your head. Your expectations of others and of how the world works is formed over many years of experiences and sometimes your personal overlay is defective; it might have been a source of self-protection once but when it continues to advise you poorly for future experiences, then it is stuck in time, and generally plain wrong. When you cease to expect other people to act in a certain way, when you start to look at the world with fresh eyes again and expect nothing apart from the fact that you are a member of a community of individuals and a world of many happenings, then you start to realize that things happen, people are the way that they are, and most importantly of all, how you react matters. For example:

> Let's say that somebody yells at you for accidentally standing on the street, as you intend to cross the road at the same time that they're coming around. There is no real fault here. You thought the road was clear, the driver did too. Neither of you had malicious intent. To take offense at the driver's fear of running you over is to place an interpretation on this event that isn't there; instead, accept that the driver was scared they'd hurt you (and that's a good intent) and that your piece in the action was equal. Simply apologize, acknowledge your own scare in the situation, and move on.

Practice talking back to yourself every time that frustration arises. It takes a long time to overcome what has become essentially a very comforting but demoralizing habit. While it might feel justified to feel a sense of outrage, persecution, and insult, where do those types of self-pitying feelings ultimately lead you? They lead to personal stagnation and a victimhood type mentality that prevents you from growing as a human being and from experiencing what the whole world truly has to offer. Don't give up on letting go the grip of frustration; it will take time but it will happen if you put in a concerted effort to change your perspective.

Resume a Friendship With a Long Lost Friend

You used to be friends, great friends. You never meant to lose touch with him or her. But life got in the way, and weeks turned into months, or maybe years. How can you go back, find your friend, and re-establish contact, resume your friendship, or is it even possible? It is possible, but sometimes it requires a little time and patience.source:wikihow.com



Find your friend. First you have to locate your friend if you've lost touch. Perhaps s/he has moved back home after graduating from college, and is in a different state. Think hard about your friend, and use every detail you can remember to track him or her down. The internet is a wonderful resource - if you can remember a middle name or initial, that's a good start. If you can remember what state s/he was from, start there - it may cost a few dollars.

Make contact. It's the hardest part. Once you have contact information, and you're reasonably sure it's the right person, reach out. This is easier if you have a mailing address, e-mail account, or a phone number. Depending on the way you left things, you may want to choose based on the tone of your last parting.

Drifted Away: If you just drifted apart, try the most direct way to reach out. Use the phone number or email. Be sure you send any email with a Delivery Confirmation - one that sends you a notice when your email is received. If you never get a confirmation, there's a good chance the email address is no good, and you'll have to go to Plan B - the phone.

Promised To Write: Use email. Send a brief note reminding your friend of who you are and asking if you've reached the right person. Try something like: "I was on a friend-finding website and saw your name. I want to make sure I got the right person - we were on the swim team together, is that you? If it is, I just want you to know seeing your name made me instantly feel so guilty and rotten that we lost touch - email me back so I know it's you! I'd love to catch up when you have a chance!" Keep it light and fun, and remember - don't beat yourself up too much: your friend didn't stay in touch with you either! Doesn't mean s/he doesn't care - just the same as you.

Parted Badly: You had a falling out and parted on bad terms, but you now wish you could patch things up. This one's a little trickier, but if you are willing to absolve your friend of any blame for what happened, fall on your sword and accept any lingering blame on yourself, and leave the past behind, your chances of success are good. Write a snail-mail letter first, to let any awkwardness be private: "Dear Siobhan: I can't tell you how many times I've thought of you over the years. I've gone over our last argument a million times in my mind, and I am so sorry for everything that went wrong. I've never been able to leave you behind, even though we parted so badly, and I've regretted it every single time I've thought about it. You meant so much to me, and were such an important, wonderful friend, I wonder if there isn't some way to let bygones be bygones? I miss you, I love you, and I want you back - please call me or email me at 555-555-5555 / yobud@yahoo.com. I hope you can forgive and forget - I have, and all I care about is seeing you again. Love, XYZ."

Call him or her. Give your letter or email at least a week after delivery to marinate, especially if your parting was not good. If you've heard nothing by 10 days later, try phoning. In the case of a bad last goodbye, you probably will do best to call at a time your friend is not going to be home. You can then leave a jovial, brief voice message, which will hopefully convince your friend that you are serious about making contact again, and prompt him or her to call you. Suggestion: "Hey, this is Harriet Scott, and I'm looking for Siobhan. Vahn - it's me, Harry! I hope I got the right number - if not, please have someone call me at 555-555-5555. If I don't hear back that this is a wrong number, I'll probably just keep on bugging someone, so please do let me know if I have NOT reached Siobhan. But if I have... Siobhan, I miss you, please call me! Kay, bye. 555-555-5555! Call!" It's kind of funny, it identifies you, and the party you're trying to reach, leaves your number at the beginning, and at the end. This is important - if they miss it both times, they can play your message back, knowing your number is right at the front and they won't have to re-listen to your entire rambling. Of course, if you later get a message saying that you have not reached the right party, you have to start from scratch to find your friend again.

Allow time for your friend to believe in your friendship again. After a long absence, it is hard for people to reattach because they've felt the pain of loss before. Sometimes, it takes a lot of effort on your part, and you may feel like you are the one working to restore your relationship all alone. That is the peril you face. Your friend may have a hard time trusting in your friendship - what if s/he resumes the relationship, only to see you check out again? Allow your friend time to believe in your steadfast love for him or her.

Connect often in the early part of the re-connect. Once you've made that first contact, hopefully things will get easier. Some friendships resume easily, as if there was never a break. Some take work, and you may sense that your friend is guarded when you speak, not telling you everything. That's okay. Especially if this is the case (a guarded friend), connect often. Call once a week - find out what's a good time when he or she can chat for a little while. If s/he has 10 minutes, chat for 10 minutes. If s/he has an hour, chat for an hour. Make time to re-establish the confidence you once had in each other.

Make contact regularly. Get into a rhythm you can both trust as the weeks and months go on. Email just to say you were thinking of him or her, with some little joke or something. Call every month, at least. Get together if you live nearby. Friend him or her on your favorite social networking site (MySpace, Facebook, etc.), and post recent pictures. Sharing your lives regularly will keep your friendship vital once you've found one another again.

Never hesitate to bring up and face problems you once had - but do not argue about those problems.

Never hesitate to let problems from the past remain in the past. Once you've acknowledged them and talked about them a little, let them go.

Go to a movie, go to coffee, go to an appointment together - whatever time your friend can make to spend with you, do it, no matter how awkward you may feel about it at first.

Act like everything is normal, fine, and wonderful. Soon, just going through the motions of feeling relaxed with your friend will help you really and truly feel relaxed and easy together again. It will take some time depending on the case.

Motivate Yourself

A simple guide to getting back up after a tough figurative fall.courtesy:wikihow.com



Instructions:

Think through a set of goals that sound like what you want, and try to be specific. The key to most motivation remains setting goals, but you can't just pick any goals.

Make it general. Let's say you want a Corvette specifically, are you really saying you want a new car, or maybe just a car you can stop worrying about? Getting yourself to a reliable car is a goal that is easier to achieve and accomplishes the need you had from the get go. This is not copping out--no one needs a Corvette.

Do this with all of the goals you have, do not simply pick ones that sound good like most people pick New Year's resolutions. If the goals you set for yourself make your life easier or more rewarding, they are probably the type you need to focus on.

Cut pictures out of the car that you want, or the TV, stereo, golf clubs, whatever you are aiming for, and put them up somewhere you can see them every day. On the fridge door, or on the wall next to the computer. When you look say "That's my car" or "That's my TV". Visualizing these items as yours will help keep you motivated.

Anyone who has had serious issues with motivation knows that someone telling you to "stay motivated" is a bit daft, since you weren't in a motivated state to begin with, and as such, is hard to stay in. However anyone can get themselves motivated.

Make your goals in the very beginning small. If you write out a long list of things that are really valuable for you to do, and then you mess one up, you're going back to starting at zero and you will likely feel pretty badly. Instead make a list for each day, and at first, only put down maybe 3 or 4 things, a set of activities that might take you 2 or 3 hours.

If you can do that, then a week later start adding things in about an hour at a time and build up. It's like doing pushups in the Army, the first day you get there and feel terrible because you can't keep up with the physical training, but you build up to it. Goals and mental attitudes are the same way. You have to make it a series of small steps. Don't set yourself up for failure by reaching too high at first. You can always reach higher the next week. There's no limit here, so pace yourself.

Rely upon yourself for the motivation and the drive. Other people do not have and will never have the same vested interest in your success. Motivation and success is a function of habit. You must break your bad habit of procrastination, and replace it with one of good planning. The most successful people in the world aren't always the brightest, or the best looking, but no matter what other talents or gifts they have been blessed with, they have underpinning their self esteem a series of victories over tasks both large and small. This is how you learn anything in school, gain confidence dating, and everything else in life.

Don't just think that you're the best, prove it to yourself. Your opinion matters the most in your own motivation, but you know when you're pulling your own leg as to your accomplishments. It's far easier to just start dealing with your responsibilities and knowing, with an incredibly strong epistemic justification (by which I mean, you KNOW this) that you can handle what comes up because you have before, than trying to know you can tackle it because you're all warm and fuzzy inside. Warm and fuzzy accomplishes very little, but neither does beating yourself up.

Reward yourself when you complete a part of your task, your mind will recognise this and you will want to do whatever you did to give yourself a treat more.

Get back up if you fall. Start again. Start where you are comfortable. Getting back up to try again, no matter how small that task, goal, activity, errand, or whim; If you can complete it, you are already back on your way. Get up, don't look back. Cheers!

Be Fearless

Everyone wants to live without fear, but the task is more psychologically challenging than physically. Fears can be overcome through interaction with them in a safe environment. Fear is what you make of it, it is learned, like speaking, and can be unlearned.
courtesy:ehow.com


Steps to follow:

> Acknowledge your fear and realize that fears are natural and different for each person

> Talk with friends and loved ones about your fear and walk through the pros and cons of living with this fear.

> Acknowledge that it may take a while to overcome your fears. Mental health is more intricate, and sometimes people take months, if not years, or a lifetime to realize the invalidity of such a fear.

> Obtain comfort with the fear. The best way to overcome it is to confront the fear in a safe controlled environment being overseen by trained professionals and loved ones.

> Recognize fears are psychologically based upon our life's history. We need rewrite our history and confront the fear head on to become fearless.

> Acknowledge life is too short to live in fear, recognize, act, and live your life. Fears are internal, life is external, and it stops for no one.

> Most Important, keep a connection with the master!

Heal a Broken Heart

Ever had someone twist your very heart from its cavern with only a couple of words, or worse just with an interminable silence? Ever had someone move on with their life as yours was left to flounder? There is a way to laugh and love again.



Few tried and tested ways:

> Try to understand why you are upset. Understand that everything happens for a reason. What exact moment made you feel upset?

>Don't think about whose fault it was - at one time or another, everyone makes mistakes. Don't worry about it.

>Do something quiet and relaxing to help you feel better. Maybe you want to take a hot bath, or meditate, or read a book. That's fine.

>In an hour, or two, or whenever you're ready, start thinking about whether you are ready to accept the other person's feelings.

>If you are, go ahead, call them, write them a note, or whatever you need to do. Maybe you want to talk face-to-face. They may not be willing to see you, or talk to you, but you should make an effort. Even if they turn you down, you feel better that you tried, and maybe they'll recognize that you made an effort.

>Understand what causes a broken heart in the first place. When we are in a mutual loving relationship we are constantly transferring our life energy (chi/ka/qi/prana) to our beloved automatically and more so when we think of them. This is based on the Huna principle: "Energy flows where attention goes". In a balanced relationship this transference of life energy is strong and has equal amounts of incoming and outgoing life energy. This helps both members feel secure and stable in a relationship even if it might be long distance. An unbalanced relationship causes this energetic flow to fall out of sync and results in an uneven distribution of incoming and outgoing life energy. This is why when we feel insecure, needy or clingy in a relationship even when there might not be a real reason behind it. The likely cause for this is because you stopped being your ex's main attention point in life and your ex didn't allow energy to flow back to you. Your ex might have had some other priorities (new job, changes in family, moving to a new city) and this lack of incoming energy is what causes one to become needy, anxious, unsettled and insecure in a relationship. But now that you have been told that you won't be able to continue your relationship with your beloved there is a conflict in mind and heart. You are still transferring life energy to your beloved automatically by thinking of them(you do love them after all!) but this is resulting in an inner conflict as you know you should stop. Your heart chakra is wide open and your mind now knows that you won't be getting any more incoming energy back from your beloved but your energetic body is still expecting it. This is why there is a great need to focus your energy on other aspects of life to balance your outgoing energy to something that will require your complete focus.

>What we miss when drawing away from a relationship is that we can't express our love anymore to someone. Ways to continue this form of heartfelt expression (and keep our wellbeing in balance on an energetic level) is to write poetry, paint, sing, dance, and do whatever it takes to allow you to transform your pain into something productive!

>Move on. When you feel you are ready to open your heart again, find someone else to be with

>Smile! Seriously, smiling makes you feel better and if you gather a few good, close friends and have a laugh together, you'll remember how good life was without him/her and that you're okay really.

>Remember the 2-year rule. It takes 2 years to learn a new job, to get accustomed to a new town and to completely heal a broken heart. If you follow these steps without remembering this first, you will be overly optimistic and disappointed. Real results are obtainable when realistic expectations are set.

>The moment he, she or it hammers the last drop of blood from your still loving/beating heart, stop arguing with that person or the fantasy voice of that person about how they are wrong and you are right. Everytime you catch yourself arguing your point in your own mind, just say stop and focus on something completely different.

>Replace the picture of your former dearest, with a picture of yourself. But keep the picture in the same place, just put a picture of you on top of it. Then every day when you walk by the picture, say I am sorry out loud to the picture. Yes you are apologizing to yourself for having gone that far around the bend for someone who didn't know your value and worth, and who doesn't matter anymore.

>Let time heal. It has been one month now. Go to someplace where you used to go or be near your so-called one-true love and go there with a friend (not alone, this is important). Mention 1 time and 1 time only how you used to drink at this very bar or your used to fend off Mr or Mrs. Wonderful's advances in that same back store room, mention it once only and then have a drink or file some papers, or do what ever you used to do, only now with a different person, preferably a comfortable friend who can smile knowingly then move the conversation forward.

>Practice being honest to yourself every day. In fact, be honest to everyone. Living in the truth of every moment will allow you to carve your way to a better relationship the next time around.

>Read a book every night before you go to sleep. You might never have read books, but nothing moves you outside of yourself better than a book, not a movie, not a music video, read a book. It will help you heal.

>If you feel ready, start dating other people again and not be a raving lunatic after about 2 months. Be careful about how you mention your ex to people you date, others can easily tell where your heart still truly lies and if just the mention of your ex's name makes your eyes well up, then you definitely need more time to heal before seeing other people. Jumping from one relationship to the next will not make you feel better in the long run as unresolved issues will appear in your new relationship.

>Speak to people. Speak to friends. They have all been through the same and will gladly help ease your burden of dealing with a broken heart.

>Come and read my blog, it may brings smile on your face :) Enjoy life! you don't get another.

Instantly Change Your Mood

Do you ever just wake up in the morning in a BAD mood?

Or maybe you stub your toe, spill your coffee, or burn your toast. Doesn't it seem that once one thing goes wrong, the whole day goes down hill?



The truth is that the reason the rest of the day goes wrong, is because of your bad mood. In other words, when you become angry about something that happens, you spend time focusing on it. And where attention goes, energy flows. This energy attracts other bad experiences. That's why it's so important to change your mood, ASAP!

Ways to Lift Your Mood:

> Breathe: nice and deep, in through the nose, out through the mouth. Take 10 long, deep breaths to get the oxygen flowing though your body and begin to relax your muscles. Sit cross-legged on the floor or lye down if possible. Continue breathing deeply.

> Listen to music: Now, I don't mean the sappy music that always makes you cry. I mean something upbeat and happy. Music that makes your toes tap.

> Laugh: Laughter really is the BEST medicine because the easiest way to turn that frown upside down is by laughing. Watch a sitcom, rent a movie. Just remember to laugh out loud.

> Find a happy thought: Just like Robin Williams (as the adult Peter Pan in the movie "Hook") needed to find his happy thought in order to fly, so do you. You can begin to rise above this bad mood if you will shift your focus from what's bothering you, to things and people that make you happy. Find a happy place, real or imagined, and picture it vividly in your mind -- the colors, the scents, everything about it. Focus on that for a minute or two while you continue to breathe deep.

> Have an attitude of gratitude: Begin with something simple and obvious, like "Thankfully, I don't have to live with my boss, I can leave him at the office and feel sorry for his wife!" or "Thank God I am in this room with the door locked for at least 5 minutes of peace!" Whatever works for you. The funnier you can make it, the faster it will lift your mood. Even things like, "It could be worse, I could be in jail in a foreign country," or "I could be living on the street, or sick and in the hospital with some terminal illness. This is really not that bad."

> Spend time with your pet: Is there anyone in your life that gives you more unconditional love than your pet? If you have a pet, you know the healing effect an animal can have on you.

> Call a friend: Now, you need to be careful with this one. You should have a good-time friend, someone that's fun and makes you feel good. This is the friend to call. You aren't calling to complain, you're calling to hear all of the wonderful and fun stories she has to share. Soon, you'll be looking up.

Remember, things could ALWAYS be worse. You could be uglier, shorter, or heavier than you are now, I am certain.

Start listing all of the good things you have to be thankful for, like being able to see and appreciate beauty, hear music and laughter, smell roses, taste good food, walk, run, dance, drive a car, talk to friends, look up good articles on the internet, etc., etc. Keep breathing deep and choosing to think of the positive instead of the negative.

In just moments, even though your circumstances may not change, your mood will. You will have succeeded in changing your thoughts, relaxing, and taking control of your mood. You will no longer allow that particular person or situation to ruin your day. You will have taken your power back, and with it, your good mood!

The Best Things in Life aren't Things

Money. It's something we all need. Whether you work for it, inherited it, saved for it, married into it, won the lottery, or some combination thereof, when you start to inch toward midlife, just make sure you have a plan so there's some left over for you to live on... and enjoy.



Financial issues can be complicated, frustrating and emotionally charged, but dealing with these things now will ensure that we're not scrambling in the future. These days we're facing global economic circumstances that aren't terribly reassuring, as well as more personal financial concerns: aging parents, college expenses for those of us who still have kids in school, and the precariousness of our own careers as we get older.
courtesy:Barbara Hannah Grufferman

Here's a "The Best Things In Life Are Free" Starter List:

> Love: the love you give and the love you get.

> Your Faith: whatever it is, it is yours to follow.

> Your Conscience: During the reign of King Henry VIII, Sir Thomas More followed his conscience: to his death: and stood behind what he believed was right. Only you can look yourself in the mirror every night at the end of every day and tell yourself that you truly did the right thing, according to your own conscience, and you didn't let anyone persuade you otherwise.

> Your Thoughts: whether you choose to share them, or keep them to yourself.

> Happiness: In most cases, we can choose to live our lives in a state of happiness with moments of unhappiness (it's the rare person who can be happy 24/7), or we can choose to be unhappy with moments of happiness.

> Laughter: Laugh every day, because no matter what's going on in the world or in your life, you can find a little humor in just about everything.

> Compassion: Be tender of heart, and the world will be a better place.

> Reading: Go to a library and check out a book or magazine, or borrow from a friend.

> Walking: I started a walking program a few years ago, and eventually added running into the mix. You can do this anytime, anywhere. The only cost is a pair of running or walking shoes. You'll be exercising your body, and your mind.

> Push-ups and Sit-ups: These are two of the most basic, and yet effective, exercises you can do (20 of each every day), and they are absolutely free.

> Singing: Even when my two teenaged daughters roll their eyes at me, I sing pretty much whenever I feel like it, which is quite often.

> Central Park: It's one of my personal "Great Wonders of the World" but there are community parks everywhere for us to enjoy.

> Eating Healthy Foods: True, it's not free, but choosing to eat healthy foods costs no more than eating unhealthy foods.

> Sex: Engaging in a loving, intimate relationship with your partner is one of the most beautiful expressions of love I can imagine.

> Attitude: My article last week was about feeling invisible: "Feeling Invisible? HuffPost Readers Speak Out": but even that is a choice. Choose living your life with a good, positive attitude, and without fear.

There are free concerts, lectures, tastings (wine and food), and so many other wonderful ways to enjoy life . . . at no cost, and in my ongoing effort to "spend less and save more," I'm always on the lookout for great ideas.

What is your "The Best Things in Life Are Free?" list?

Colors Affect Your Heart Rate / Life

Most people love color and want to paint every room in their house. Others don't care for it at all. If you are thinking of repainting you need to keep one thing in mind. Colors can effect out mood and make us sad or happy; they affect our eating habits and even our heart rate. Most people don't put this much though into color and what is does to us. It is proven that several colors actually raise our heart rates while others can lower it. Take into mind which color to paint a room with what you will be doing in that room.

If you are repainting a room that you are going to use to relax in you will want to use a color that will lower your heart rate.

If you are painting your home gym you will want one that will raise your heart rate. The color red.

The color yellow can actually raise your heart rate.

The color blue and purple lower it.



While yellow can raise your heart rate it can also improve your concentration which is why legal note pads are yellow. Yellow would be a very good color choice for a home office or a hobby room.

The color red is a tricky color; it can raise your heart rate and evoke passion and energy or is can make you frustrated or angry. This color is a popular choice in bedrooms or accent walls. If you use this as an accent wall you will be able to have a more muted reaction to it.

If you are looking to repaint a living room or dining room think about what you want the mood to be in there.

If you want an energetic and vibrant living room go with a bolder color like yellow.

But if you want a more relaxed casual living room to kick back in then think blues and greens and purples. It is very important to think about what mood you want for a room and what you do in that room before you repaint.

Keep in mind that colors can really change how you feel especially if you are looking at them on a daily basis.

Whichever you choose make sure to have a variety of rooms. You will want a relaxing room every once in a while and you will want a high energy room as well.
author:Jenny Dixie

Simple ways to live a life you love

The quickest way to living a life you love is through learning to love the life you live.



You’re waiting for something to change in your life before you can be happy. You might think if only you had a different partner (or one at all), a better job, or kids that did their homework then surely you’d be happy. Surely then you’d wake each morning with the glow of one living a life worth loving. Enough! Here are 5 ways to get started:

* Be present: You must be aware of your current existence and that you have control over your perspective. Whether you’re willing away early morning grouchiness or seeing a messy house as a chance to teach teamwork, your choice of perspective will make all the difference between just living and loving.

* Practice gratefulness: Every day, no excuses. Pretend to be grateful if you must. It’s one of those things that catches up to you quickly as life reciprocates your emotional generosity. Seeing the good in your life will allow you to keep your heart fed while you work to change the more unsavory parts. Try it. Live it. You’ll love it.

* Pursue balance: As a person given to extremes this has always been a tough one for me. I’ll go from taking great care of myself and communicating well to abandonment and silence as I let work consume me. The pursuit of balance requires constant adjustment as your life shifts but every time I really try for the middle I end up happier about my life. And that’s truly the point.

* Nurture friendships: You know the people who for some reason or other welcome you into their lives? Treasure them. Make time to spend with them. It is those relationships that you’ll look back on with satisfaction when you get old and begin to wonder what your life was worth. Many of us spend far too much time thinking about how some material possession will improve our lives. An iMac would be nice. A good friend is worth just about everything though!

* Embrace simplicity: You don’t need to have all your gold-plated ducks in a row in order to love the life you’re living. You don’t need lots of stuff and relationships so driven by drama that you often wish just to be left alone in silence. Instead you might try for a simpler approach and enjoy things because they are useful and not because they are expensive. You might join a friend just to talk and not worry about all the expensive trappings we so often heap on get-together’s. Try for simplicity and if complexity sneaks up on you, so be it. In learning to love the basics you’ll find a wondrous appreciation for the nicer things that come along.